Mothers and Mass Shootings

grayscale photo of a boy aiming toy gun selective focus photography
Photo by Pixabay on

I invite you to keep “old news” alive and to reflect with me. What can we mothers do to NOT become mothers of children that die in a mass shooting or the mothers of the children that pull the trigger? Please, help me find this answer.

So far, all I did was to cry for the mothers who lost their sons and daughters. I also cried for the woman who now has become a mother of a young mass shooter. The mother of the Dimitrios Pagourtzis, a 17-year-old who entered his High School in Santa Fe, Texas, and killed nine students and one teacher last Friday (May 18).

I wished it never happened. I wished he was a kind, happy teenager hanging out with those same 10 people and having fun that Friday. I wished he was in love and dating a cool girl. I wished that Friday he was excited about an upcoming game or a volunteer job that he just got involved in. I wished that Friday he was using his strategic mind on a very different project, one that would make a positive impact on people’s lives. But no, that Friday he chose to enter his high school with 2 guns, open fire and take people’s lives.  

blue and yellow plastic toy revolver pistol
Photo by on

I can’t stop thinking about how some day this young shooter, Dimitrios Pagourtzis, was a little baby boy just like mine. I am sure he was cute and happy just like all small children are. I can even imagine him innocently playing with toys guns. As the years passed though, what made him choose to kill instead of choosing to be an ordinary teenager and even an extraordinary one? I wished I could ask him this question. And even though any reason could never justify taking people’s lives, it would reveal what kind of nightmare or pain he was in that the only way out for him was to shoot.

IMG_0761To all the moms that lost their loved ones, I send my love and I pray God gives you strength. To Dimitris’ mother, I also send prayers because I am sure her world is forever transformed and she will be forever labeled as a mass shooter’s mother. She, surely, will be blamed and judged. I hope she can stand strong and doesn’t blame herself for what happened. I hope she forgives her son because nobody else can right now. Please, visit him in prison where he will probably be kept for the rest of his life. Continue to love him unconditionally, just like you did when he was a baby boy. Didn’t you?

To all other moms that like me are reflecting about mass shootings in the U.S. I still have this question: what can we do to not become mothers of children that die in a mass shooting or the mothers of the of children that pull the trigger? Please, I ask you again to help me find this answer.


Author: theoctopusmama

My name is Ana Rubenstein. I am a mother willing to inspire other mothers and to be inspired by them. I have two children and I often feel just like an octopus with its 8 tentacles multitasking and juggling the many hats I wear in life. Wife, daughter, sister, friend, Zumba instructor, and motherhood blogger. Nice to meet you, I am the Octopus Mama.

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